About time for some pictures

One time when Jared and I went to my family's house over the weekend, a year or so ago, they all shared their "Roses, Buds, and Thorns," over Sunday dinner. The "rose" was the good part of the day, "bud" was something you were looking forward to, and "thorn" is the not so great part of the day. I loved it, so....

Our Roses:

-I learned how to cook black beans from scratch. This is a big deal to me because I buy endless cans of them and have done so since Jared and I got married. One of my friends in the ward learned how to cook them and this motivated me to. They are SO much better than canned beans, not only nutritionally but they taste better AND I love the feeling that I can do it on my own. No more relying on expensive cans of beans (in comparison to bagged beans, my goodness).

-For the last month Ashlyn has been sleeping through the night from 7 pm or so until about 7:30 am (every now and then she has a little snack around 9 pm, but this is not the norm) This is heavenly, as you can imagine (thank you "Baby-Wise," by Ezzo). Some people love it and others don't, but hey, if your baby is sleeping like that and has been almost since she was two months old, how can you not love it?

-Jared has a good job and he really enjoys it. In todays economy this is a tremendous blessing and we're thankful.

-I made graham crackers and wheat thins. This has been on my to-do list for a very long time. Wow, the graham crackers were "wildly successful," (as quoted by Jared) and the wheat thins were pretty good. I don't know if I'd make the wheat thins again but definitely the graham crackers...wow. When you're a stay-at-home mom this is the kind of stuff you do to find fulfillment. Really though, I absolutely love finding new things to create.

-We had one of the most beautiful days a week or so ago. It was perfect weather, in my book, no humidity, a light breeze, sun, and a beautiful out-door mall that I took Kaylee and Ashlyn to. I soaked up every single moment of it, knowing that it won't last too much longer.

-I've been studying nutrition. I read the book "Master you Metabolism" by Jillian Michaels. Phenomenal, that's all I can say.

-We finally bought a new mattress. Ours was so old and Jared's body was aching because of it. He's much happier with our new one.

-Kaylee now has conversations with me. This has made being a mom really fun. We don't always understand one another but we do our best. She is so polite. We have worked really hard at teaching her to say "please," and "thank you." It has really paid off. She says it on her own now so well and it makes me such a proud mom.

-Jared's brother, Mark, is coming for an internship at USAA, in about a month. We really love Mark and are so excited to have him here. Yea for family!

-We love our little girls a lot. They make us so happy (and so tired)

-Jason has been on his mission for over two months! Yea for missionaries...

-And, I love Jared... a lot. There, that's something to be very happy about.

-I have made friends with some wonderful girls in the ward here. Every Tuesday we have our "homemade Tuesday," time. We pick something we want to make and meet up at someone's house around 11 am and have fun making it. We've made ice cream, laundry detergent, mozzarella cheese, salsa, tortillas, bread, all sorts of things. It's fun getting together. We also take our kids around to each others pools (people swim a lot here in Texas..hot humid weather will do that to you).

-I also love it that whenever I start cooking dinner or baking something Kaylee runs over and says "make, make." This is what she says when she wants to help me make something. So we pull up a chair and she stirs, mixes, and creates yummy things right alongside me. I'm learning to relax about how much of a mess it creates. I want her to remember cooking and making messes with her mom in the kitchen like I remember doing so with my mom.

Rub a dub dub
Isn't that such a clever easter cake? I thought it was adorable.

Easter egg hunt with other little girls in the ward

Making home-made ice cream with my friends and the kids. It's the kind that you shake around in a bad full of salt and ice.

Our Buds:

- I look forward to (and also dread) the day Kaylee is potty-trained. I keep putting this off.

-Going to Europe in 2013. Ang and Austin decided to save up for it and they'll be done with school at that point. We asked if they wouldn't mind the company (Jared's never been and I'm just itching to go again). My parents may come with us too. Ah! So we're going to save up for it these next two years.

-Seeing Jared after work today.

-Fall. I'm already looking forward to that around here in San Antonio.

Caught in the act of licking the bowl!

This was that perfect day at the out-door mall.

Our Thorns:

-Summer is nigh upon us around here. I'm not looking forward to being here in the summer. That being said, I am SO thankful for AC!

-Flies. When these Texas flies get in your house they do not want to leave. We don't get a lot, but when we get one it's a lot of work to chase it around and swat it.

-It's sad not to go out and take walks like I used to all the time. It's starting to get too muggy, plus I don't live in an area like I used to where I could get out and walk to the library, the store, all over compus, to friend's homes, anywhere. You have to drive to get where you want to go.

-Sometimes (a lot of the time) being a mom is just plain exhausting.

Samoa cupcakes. Oh delicious! It was one of my friend's birthdays so we had a picnic outing and brought these along.

Girls night out during priesthood session. Kaylee was loving that ice cream cone.
April Fools cupcakes. Popcorn, peas and carrots, spaghetti, and mashed potatoes.

So these are some of the goods and the not so goods in our life right now...but I'm happy to say that it's mostly good.

Let's play catch up

Today we went to the park by our house and had breakfast.

A few weekends ago we went downtown San Antonio and saw this beautiful little Japanese Garden.

And then we took a train ride around the park, which Kaylee loved.

She's in heaven.


Hawaii date night at the Cook house. Since we can't go to Hawaii I thought I'd bring Hawaii to us. Aloha!

Hmm....Waikiki meatballs, rice, sweet rolls, and spinach fruit salad followed by almond fruit bread. Oh yum, was that worth the time it took to make it!
We took our friends to visit the Japanese Gardens when they came to stay with us.

Isn't it gorgeous!



Whoa, little crooked neck there.
Happy Birthday Kaylee. Two years old, we just can't believe it. Can you believe what this modern technology allows us to do? We even played a card game with my sister and her husband on skype, them in Rexburg, us in San Antonio. It's amazing we can do this sort of stuff, don't you think.
That is an eight layer cake. Lots of lovin' and time went into this cake for Kaylee.




And another year for our traditional valentines day dinner. We always stay at home and have dinner and invite someone or a couple over to join us. This year our friends we invited weren't able to make it so we had to do it alone.

I love to bake. I love, love, love it. I get this urge to make stuff, lots of stuff, anything good, all the time, on a daily basis. I have a wish list written on my fridge of all these yummy desserts, breads, main dishes, and snacks I can't wait to make. Aren't these big kisses fun! I found this idea on http://www.bakerella.com/for-valentines-day-give-someone-a-big-kiss/ (same blog for the eight layer cake). I do make healthy things, even though there aren't pictures of them, but, let's be honest here, who wants pictures of spinach when you can take a picture of this!

This life we live

My oh my, what big eyes you have Ashlyn

Saying goodbye to Jason before he left for his mission and we left for Texas.

So I'm not very good at this blogging thing...big surprise. When I have something I can't wait to say I write about it in my journal, good or bad, happy or sad. It's one of the most therapeutic things I've discovered in my life, thanks to my 12th grade english teacher that required us to keep a journal my entire senior year. It's changed my life and I'm now on my 12th journal. Thank you Mrs...? Oh I can't remember your name, but you changed my life. So when I do write something on this blog it's usually when I feel happiest, which is why I probably always come across on this thing as a constantly happy person. When I need to vent my poor journal hears about it, or actually my poor husband, I should say, and then my journal.

In a Relief Society meeting not too long ago I made a comment about the struggle I have to overcome myself and my own weaknesses. After the meeting the lady sitting next to me said "wow, you always seem so put together though." Her comment made me think about life. I have my challenging days...yes, I definitely do. I feel just as insecure as the next person does. I remember growing up and being so anxious to go to college, serve a mission, get married, and have a family, and thinking that life would be so perfect. And then I went to college. I was so homesick the first semester and went home a lot. After that first semester though I fell in love with BYU-Idaho and never looked back, dreading the day I would have to graduate and leave. And then I dated Jared. Not at all a fairy tale story there, not like I'd always dreamed of. Jared and I have admitted this to ourselves a million times. It was a blast to date each other and we have some wonderful memories of that time, but oh wow, it was rough. It was so up and down, up and down, dating, not dating, dating, not dating, holding hands, not holding hands, would I serve a mission, not sure anymore but dating Jared, now not dating Jared (just for the record, this was mostly my fault it was so dramatic, not Jared's). But wow, what an important time in our lives for the both of us together.

And then I served a mission. All I can say is that it was the hardest thing I've ever done, and I mean brutally hard in all ways...emotionally, physically, and spiritually...I honestly thought I'd never make it through eighteen months of it day after day. But it was by far one of the single greatest blessings I have in my entire life.

And then I got married. That's been better than I ever thought but certainly not because marriage is a fairy tale like I dreamt of when I was little and watched "Beauty and the Beast." Marriage is just real life, plain and simple. You agree, then you don't agree, so you figure out how to agree. You work hard, play hard, laugh hard and cry hard with and for each other a lot. And then we started our family. I always thought being pregnant would be such a wonderful and rewarding experience. Um, not for me, I guess because I hate being pregnant. I just make it through one day at a time. And I don't even have it bad. I'm not too sick and I don't get too big, but that doesn't matter. I still struggle and cry a lot at night wondering how on earth I can make it through four more months, then three more months, then two more months, being pregnant. It's just uncomfortable, can't sleep, feel sick, clothes don't fit, I feel self-conscious, my skin breaks out, lots of pain, and I spend more time in the bathroom than anywhere else. I literally just grin and bear it and try to smile. I have to read a lot of talks from the Prophets where they talk about how motherhood is the noblest calling. This pumps me up, otherwise I just cry. But then the baby comes and that's it, your heart is wrapped around that baby forever. So now I'm a mom and it is the most incredibly rewarding experience I've had and am having, but, let's be honest here, it's totally exhausting. There is not one other thing I'd rather be doing than staying at home all day with my two little girls because I love it and them so much, but I have countless moments where I think "how can I go on?" And then I call my mom and cry for while, and somehow, because she made it I can too

My whole life I've always prayed that the Lord would send me out in the mission field, some where "out there" where there aren't so many members, where missionary work is desperately needed, where I can make a difference, so I can give my family a similar experience to what I had for ten years growing up in England. I've always dreamed of this, always, since I was a little girl. Then it happened.....what on earth was I thinking when I prayed for that? I didn't comprehend that I'd be giving up so much of what I love and am most comfortable with... all of my family, friends, people with similar values surrounding me everywhere, peace and tranquility, the beauty of Utah and Idaho, dry weather, nice cool beautiful falls and winters. I got what I dreamed of and now...? It's tough. I do not, I repeat, do not like hot weather. I do not like city life, I do not like dealing with traffic everywhere, and I love nature. So....here I am right in San Antonio, Tx, one of the biggest cities in the United states, nice and hot and humid. Just remember, I prayed for this, but not this at the same time. I can't tell you how many times I prayed and prayed, during this last fall semester, that Heavenly Father would please please please find somewhere else for us to be...but that was not His answer and so here I am, learning to find joy in living here.

So life is full of ups and downs. We take a big deep breath and go on. And yes, I am really, truly, deeply happy, in spite of it all.

President Gordon B. Hinckley

"Anyone who imagines that bliss is normal is going to waste a lot of time running around shouting that he's been robbed. The fact is that most putts don't drop, most meat is tough, most children grow up to be just people, most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration, most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is like an old time rail journey....delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride."

And another year is here...

Wow, three years! Can hardly believe, but yet I almost don't remember what it was like not to be married. It was Jared's year to plan what we were going to do to celebrate our anniversary. We went out to dinner at Wingers (a favorite of mine), and then he surprised me by taking us to the Hinckley building at BYU-Idaho, where there are couches near big windows that overlook campus. He brought blankets and his laptop and we watched "Counte of Monte Cristo." It was great fun. Jared felt bad that it didn't snow like it was supposed to. Originally he wanted to watch the movie outside (yes, outside in the freezing weather), in this little gazebo thing they have in the gardens on campus. There's an outlet plug inside the gazebo and he brought our electric blanket so we could plug it in, watch the movie, and enjoy the snow falling. Well, no falling snow but lots of wind so we opted for the beautiful view from the warm Hinckley building.

Ashlyn, what a joy! I didn't know I could love her so much. She has such big, beautiful eyes. And what a good little sleeper at night. She'll wake up once around 2-3 am for a quick little milky snack and then that's it. She'll sleep soundly until 7:30-8:00 (just fyi: if you really struggle to get your baby to sleep through the night read "On Becoming Babywise," by Ezzo or something like that. It has made all the difference for me and worked with Kaylee and seems to be working with Ashlyn. READ IT!). Anyway, I'm enjoying the newborn stage all over again, where I can just sit and hold my little baby all I want. And then I'm enjoying Kaylee and the crazy new words she says. She loves deodorant. She takes one of mine to bed and carries it around the house with her. Then she'll say "apit" and raise her arm up so we can put the deodorant on her. She keeps us in laughter around here (and in shape trying to chase her around the house). We love our little girls!

And now our days consist of getting ready to move to San Antonio, Tx. We are leaving Idaho around the end of January. Oh to enjoy the last of my winter days here...so so pretty. I will always think that snow is one of the most beautiful things.