I am just like all of the other new parents out there. For such a long time I couldn't understand why new parents only post/take pictures of their new little baby and none of themselves. I used to complain about this to Jared, especially since I wanted to see pictures and hear about the parents since they were the ones I knew...Well now I think I understand because I am becoming just like that. I don't care about posting or taking many pictures of myself anymore...all I want to do is capture the moments that Kaylee brings. I am just like all of the other sentimental parents out there.

On that note, something that worried me a great deal before Kaylee was born was wondering how I was going to be able to love her enough to get me through the sleepless nights, the dirty diapers, the financial obligations, the tremendous responsibility, having to learn to put her first, and not being able to go out everyday and feel like I was making a noticable difference in the world like I felt I could do with being a student and the possibilities that would lead to and the academic advising job that I had on campus. I LOVED that job and wanted to keep it forever, or do something just like it for a career. It was really hard for me to let it go....But now I think I'm ok with not working there anymore, even though it was one of the best experiences I've had for a job. I've started to recognize again that President Harold B. Lee was right on the mark when he said "the greatest work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own home."

When Kaylee was born and I saw her I loved her, but it wasn't this all encompassing love right away like I was expecting and I suppose that's because I didn't know anything about her yet. But I've found that slowly, over this last month of being with her and changing her diapers, feeding her, holding her when she cries, being up at night with her, laughing with Jared at her funny faces,and kneeling by her crib with Jared to say our night prayers, that I'm learning to love her more and more. I find myself getting excited to see her when I'm away from her or when she's taking a nap. I'm learning to find the joys!